This one's for you, JME... courtesy of the Monty Python Spam Kit...
Man:You sit here, dear.Wife:All right.Man:Morning!Waitress:Morning!Man:Well, what've you got?Waitress:Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam;Vikings:Spam spam spam spam...Waitress:...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam...Vikings:Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!Waitress:...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.Wife:Have you got anything without spam?Waitress:Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.Wife:I don't want ANY spam!Man:Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?Wife:THAT'S got spam in it!Man:Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?Vikings:Spam spam spam spam... (Crescendo through next few lines...)Wife:Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?Waitress:Urgghh!Wife:What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like spam!Vikings:Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!Waitress:Shut up!Vikings:Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!Waitress:Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can't have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam.Wife:I don't like spam!Man:Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it. I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam!Vikings:Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!Waitress:Shut up!! Baked beans are off.Man:Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?Waitress:You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam... (but it is too late and the Vikings drown her words)Vikings:(Singing elaborately...) Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam!
Man:You sit here, dear.Wife:All right.Man:Morning!Waitress:Morning!Man:Well, what've you got?Waitress:Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam;Vikings:Spam spam spam spam...Waitress:...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam...Vikings:Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!Waitress:...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.Wife:Have you got anything without spam?Waitress:Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.Wife:I don't want ANY spam!Man:Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?Wife:THAT'S got spam in it!Man:Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?Vikings:Spam spam spam spam... (Crescendo through next few lines...)Wife:Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?Waitress:Urgghh!Wife:What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like spam!Vikings:Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!Waitress:Shut up!Vikings:Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!Waitress:Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can't have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam.Wife:I don't like spam!Man:Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it. I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam!Vikings:Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!Waitress:Shut up!! Baked beans are off.Man:Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?Waitress:You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam... (but it is too late and the Vikings drown her words)Vikings:(Singing elaborately...) Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam!
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SSS PPP AAA MMM
ASSASSINATION
OK PG
NO MORE SPAM
CASCARONES???
TAKE CARE OVER THERE
ALOHA
HAVE FUN
