BravoTV Message Boards > Top Chef -- Off-Topic

Snagglepuss

July 4, 2008 - 01:44 AM

QUOTE (dogabone @ July 1, 2008 - 04:39 PM)

Hey, kids! The BBB has generously given us an OT thread on the Shear Genius board! I'd like to think it's 'cause I requested it, but I don't think I have that much influence!

Why won't the other kids come to the Shear Genius boards?

I swear I don't have ticks (but your story did make me itchy Brillke...

)
.... I just bought a new flea collar!!!

Heavens to Mergatroid!!!

onionmark

July 4, 2008 - 02:19 AM

QUOTE

Most users ever online was 1,221 on June 4, 2008 - 09:15 PM

Saw this on the Bravo Boards Stat Page - way to go, TC fanatics! It makes me proud, and just a little humble, to be one of the many.

{Okay, I was just a lurking guest, not a member, but they counted my nose w/ the rest of ya'lls. Noses.)

chucole

July 4, 2008 - 06:48 AM

NEED HELP
have to make a (expletive deleted) tremendous amount of egg rolls and crab rangoons.
Should I partially fry them and then put in single layer on a cookie sheet til ready for use? Cooking them per order is not a option.
Should I make them fresh and single layer on a cookie sheet and risk the delicate skin tearing? Coat the wax paper with some nice olive or vegetable oil (either way)
Have the deep fryers where they will be served, so that is not the problem.
Anyone have a flash fryer they can get me asap?
Thoughts please.

johnw

July 4, 2008 - 06:17 PM

QUOTE (notevayas @ July 1, 2008 - 05:02 PM)

Eh, Growing up in a house of women, Kotex was a memorable word, especially after I found a box as a tot and tied them into a "choo-choo train" and dragged them down the hall to the livingroom. You would have thought I burned down the house from the screaming!

I never did find out why I wasn't to have any..

Kotex, Tampax. One of the things that I had to do while in the military was to qualify with an M-16 at the Camp Pendleton rifle range. Since Childhood I have had no hearing in my left ear - nerve damage. The constant firing eventually took its toll on my remaining good ear leaving me temporarily deaf. I managed to purchase a box of Tampax ( I forget where) and cut one of them to length making for a good sound suppressor. And no, I didn't have a string hanging from my right ear. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

bJason

July 5, 2008 - 03:48 PM

In case any of you care (and I won't blame you if you don't) - I finally have the music for the wedding - was informed yesterday that I only needed ONE hour (after I took more than 20 to compile almost SIX!!)

Track Title Artist
1
The Way You Look Tonight - Fred Astaire
2
You Are - Kem
3
A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley
4
Ain't No Mountain High Enough - Marvin Gaye
5
For Once In My Life - Stevie Wonder
6
You're the First, the Last, My Everything - Barry White
7
At Last - The Wedding Singers
8
Here and Now - Luther Vandross
9
L - O - V - E - Natalie Cole
10
Stagger Lee - Lloyd Price
11
Build Me Up Buttercup - The Foundations
12
Your Love Keeps Lifting Me (Higher & Higher) - Jackie Wilson
13
If I Could Build My Whole World Around You - Marvin Gaye
14
Dream A Little Dream - Mamma Cass
15
Always and Forever - Luther Vandross
16
Our Love Is Here To Stay - Natalie Cole
17
Signed, Sealed, Delivered - Stevie Wonder
18
Save the Last Dance For Me - Michael Bublé

Thanks, again TO EVERYONE who "chimed in"! It was a great help! I feel pretty good about it - given my audience and such. My EVIL friend knew I would obsess (or maybe even abcess) about this when she asked me to do it.

I HATE OCD - dammit, dammit, dammit (was that three times? yes, ok)

!!

Thanks again!

woshkie

July 6, 2008 - 01:07 AM

QUOTE (brillke @ July 1, 2008 - 08:26 AM)

Is anyone else having a problem with an unusually high amount of ticks this year?

Chase is in his 3rd Scout day camp,has 2 more to go,for a total of 15 days of day camp. Then,he has had 4 days of overnight camp and has 3 more days of it in late July. Of the 12 days of camp he has already had,he has had ticks on him every time he comes home. We put Backwoods OFF(I think thats the name) on him in the morning and its reapplied at lunchtime but hes still getting ticks. Its always worked before but maybe we need to switch brands.

Last night,after he took a bath,I did my usual tick search. I found 1 and thats it. He got up this morning and was getting dressed and let out a yelp. He came running to me and was like "LOOK!" There was a tick on his penis and it was pretty engorged. I know it was not on his body last night so I assume it was on his shoes or clothes. I removed the tick and did another search and sure enough,there was another on his leg.

They were both tiny Deer ticks and those are the ones that carry Lyme disease. Im calling the dr when the office opens.

Weve even had problems with our dogs and ticks. They both get Frontline Plus from the vet and its put on every month except in the winter. For some reason,they are still biting Fido. One day,I took 3 ticks off him. Ive only removed one from Wishbone but I have seen a few crawling on him.

We dont have a lot of yard so Im kinda freaked out by seeing so many ticks. I dont think I removed but 1 or 2 ticks from Wishbone or Chase last year ,we didnt have Fido until Sept. and neither tick was sucking blood,just crawling around.

We are probably averaging 5 ticks a day here and thats just unheard of. If ticks are already this bad,how bad will the mosquitoes be? They were already terrible and I dont even want to imagine how bad they could get.

Edited to add: Just got off the phone with the Dr and he wants to see Chase. He said he has had an unusual amount of people getting bit by Deer ticks this year. Was the same way a few years ago with brown recluses and I got bit. So,kid aint gonna be happy with having to do blood work but it must be done. He doesnt go until Thursday so will be a few long days here.

Oh,I also called the vet and explained about the dogs and the ticks and he thinks they,the ticks,have become immune to the meds so we are switching brands. Too bad I bought a years supply,24 tubes,and have 18 left. I bet he will let me trade for the new ones,I hope.

Hey Brillke, I work in a hospital ER and we see our share of tick bites each year. This year I would have to say we have seen less than usual. Some years it starts really early in the spring and goes all summer with multiple cases per day but not so this year. It may also depend on what part of the country you are in. We are in the western part of Massachusetts.

Pita

July 6, 2008 - 02:11 PM

bJason, I lurrrrve the music selection. Very much.

Brillke, I'm sorry Chase has been bombarded this year. I have two friends, this year, test positive for Lyme's. I know Chase didn't like getting the bloodwork done, but better safe than sorry. I hope he's doing okay. (((Mom&Chase)))

Tula Dahlink, I hope I'm not too late for your springroll/rangoon fest. Since you have the availability of the fryer on site, perhaps make them up and lightly coat the wrappers with a thin toss of oil. Thin, so they don't dry out and tear. Then single layer on sheets w/ wax/parchment paper divides. I hope everything turns out loverly!

Snagglepuss, I just might have to venture over to see what you all are up to. *ornery grin* Admittedly, I don't watch regularly enough, but this week's epi teaser had me gasp out loud.

I freak when I get 2" cut, but OMG. Did you see how long their hair are?!?! I'm tawkin' Cher circa 1976 lonnnnng.

TCPhil

July 7, 2008 - 09:25 PM

QUOTE (dcjewbear @ June 12, 2008 - 02:38 PM)

I don't remember if I told youse guys (at least those of youse who know me well) that I got an ipod nano during the holiday season, and that I love it. Well, the headphone jack went on it, and, since it's still under warranty, they are sending me a bag to send it back to them, and they'll send me a new one.

I listen to it a lot, though, and I've been kind of down about it not working. It's really small, and the 4GB space is good enough for lots of tunes, and a few TV shows, so I've been missing it.

Yesterday Denny asked me why I wasn't using it, since he knows how fond I am of always having entertainment. When I told him what was up he excused himself and left the room.

When he returned he had a small box, and told me that he had a father's day gift for me, but he figured that he could give it to me a few days early. It's an ipod classic which holds 80GB, and he had been saving his money for 6 months so he could buy it for me. Yes, he had saved $250.00 so he could give me a nice father's day gift. He included a $100.00 gift card and I abruptly turned on the waterworks.

So, it's big enough to hold almost my entire itunes collection, and I've been having a grand old time getting stuff from itunes that I wouldn't normally buy with my cash, but is wonderful for free. Do I have the greatest grandson in the world, or what?

Happy! Happy! Joy! Joy!

That brought a tear to my eye too...

...

TCPhil

July 7, 2008 - 09:41 PM

QUOTE (bJason @ June 12, 2008 - 08:28 PM)

OK, guys/gals! I am a bit tipsy. I have run across a song for the wedding. I want it to be MY song with the bride (my best friend). Being a great big homo/theatre guy, I am having huge visions of a giant "impromptu" Broadway-style musical number!

My whole life (in my head, at least) is a series of production numbers strung together by sequeys!

I thought you folks would appreciate/get a kick out of this and would have the imagination to envision the "number".

Here's the song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY60CkP1qAc

Thanks again for your help and new-found friendship!

I can just see you in the Carmen Miranda, outfit...

...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 12:57 AM

QUOTE (dcjewbear @ June 15, 2008 - 10:47 PM)

I could write all day about my father and never do him justice. I'll just say that I loved him then, still do, and hope to be the person to my grandson that he was to me. He was the sun, the moon, the stars, and he left me when I was 39; much too soon, but I'll always have him in my heart.

As y'all can see I'm doin' some catch up...

...Bear, I am so with you...I wish I knew how to tell my dad, how awsome he is...I am so sorry for your loss...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 01:11 AM

QUOTE (daverocks @ June 16, 2008 - 11:43 PM)

So here is a personal problem. I need you guys' objective opinion on this matter. I know you will give it to me b/c you don't have any needs from me like my friends/co-workers/family. which situation do you think is better? I know there isn't much to chose between the two, but moving out on my own is not an option right now, it's just too expensive.

A. Largest room in a 4 bedroom house. Own bathroom, gigantic closet, garden tub, huge room.
Bills paid-Internet, trash, water, electricity
Bills I pay-Cable, Telephone
Drawbacks:
4 people live in the house. 1 person is a total jerk. he is dating the roommate whose family owns the house. The other roommate is her brother and I am number 4. The jerk wears his boxers around the house, is an alcoholic, smokes behind his woman's back, does no chores, takes other people's beer and comments to roommates brother how hot 17 year old girls are while he is in his 40's and talks down to his gf.
House is southwest of city. Somewhat of a commute but nice area. All my friends are south or central and all my favorite cool places to eat and hang out are south central.
Internet sucks and roommate seems to not care to try and get it fixed.
Roommates leave dirty dishes piled up on the counter for days.
Dog hair is everywhere.

B. Have a bedroom and bathroom to myself for 100 dollars less than what I am paying now with bills included except phone and cable.
My niece would love to have me as her roommate.
Drawbacks
Live with my niece (who is a good friend, more like a sister) her two young kids (3 & 1) and her boyfriend who certainly have their fair share of drama. BF can be somewhat of a douchebag.
Family will think something is wrong that I have to move in with my niece when and it will look like I am broke or something.
Much smaller closet
No garden tub.
Way way up north-but have the possiblity of working from a north location to save on gas. However, I would still have to drive to other locations frequently for meetings and such.
friends and fun places I like to hang out south and central.
Would have to find a new place April of next year when nieces lease is up b/c they are most likely going to move.

Go with plan B...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 01:17 AM

QUOTE (onionmark @ June 17, 2008 - 02:28 AM)

KK, I apologize for running out on you before I read your invitation to go OT.

The thing about grammar is, that indeed the rules were invented by old dead white guys and some of them don't make a lick of sense. In the bad old days, when educated people conversed in french, wrote law in Latin, and studied ancient greek just for the fun of it, English was a silly, savage, stepchild of a language. It did not have a standardized spelling, grammar, or many advocates.

Good King Alfred (I may have misremembered the king's name, but I'm on a roll) commanded that an Academy of Study be formed to codify English grammar, spelling and usage. Ta-da! In order to be taken seriously, the academicians decided to adopt the rules of grammar and usage of Formal Latin, Greek, and French.

(Hang in there, this is so funny) English has since then been divided into two main camps - Formal (Academic) and Vulgar (What the People Want) and the funny part is, language is changed from the common to the formal. Things that weren't acceptable 50 years ago are commonplace in formal usage. The rules, through common usage, appear to slacken. Actually, I believe that the rules adopted from the Greeks and Romans are slowly being replaced by rules that make sense.

The prime example of a rule that English doesn't need is the one against split infinitives. (Punchline coming up!) The ancient languages were inflected - the infinitive verb form was a single word, not an infinitive phrase as it is in English. Therefor, it was impossible to split an infinitive in the classical languages. English is more flexible and fun. What sounds better? "To go boldly where none have gone before?" Or: "To Boldly Go . . .?"

I am an advocate for good grammar, standardized spelling and other benchmarks of civilization. But stupid grammar that gets in the way of rhythm and clarity must fall by the wayside. Split an Infinitive today!

There. I told you it was funny.

Talk about "Highbrow" humor...

...I barely gradgiated high skool...LOL...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 01:20 AM

QUOTE (onionmark @ June 17, 2008 - 02:28 AM)

KK, I apologize for running out on you before I read your invitation to go OT.

The thing about grammar is, that indeed the rules were invented by old dead white guys and some of them don't make a lick of sense. In the bad old days, when educated people conversed in french, wrote law in Latin, and studied ancient greek just for the fun of it, English was a silly, savage, stepchild of a language. It did not have a standardized spelling, grammar, or many advocates.

Good King Alfred (I may have misremembered the king's name, but I'm on a roll) commanded that an Academy of Study be formed to codify English grammar, spelling and usage. Ta-da! In order to be taken seriously, the academicians decided to adopt the rules of grammar and usage of Formal Latin, Greek, and French.

(Hang in there, this is so funny) English has since then been divided into two main camps - Formal (Academic) and Vulgar (What the People Want) and the funny part is, language is changed from the common to the formal. Things that weren't acceptable 50 years ago are commonplace in formal usage. The rules, through common usage, appear to slacken. Actually, I believe that the rules adopted from the Greeks and Romans are slowly being replaced by rules that make sense.

The prime example of a rule that English doesn't need is the one against split infinitives. (Punchline coming up!) The ancient languages were inflected - the infinitive verb form was a single word, not an infinitive phrase as it is in English. Therefor, it was impossible to split an infinitive in the classical languages. English is more flexible and fun. What sounds better? "To go boldly where none have gone before?" Or: "To Boldly Go . . .?"

I am an advocate for good grammar, standardized spelling and other benchmarks of civilization. But stupid grammar that gets in the way of rhythm and clarity must fall by the wayside. Split an Infinitive today!

There. I told you it was funny.

I'll bet y'all and KK are members of POEM(Proffesional Orginization of English Majors)...Along with MoHub...

...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 02:12 AM

Hi ya gang...

Jazz, may I please book y'all's porch for the Death of Jesse Helms, party?...I think a full bbq is in order...

...The man was a bigot, racist, homophobe, misogonist(hated women),and an all around a$$...When I heard he croaked I said "YES-Thank-you God"...
Were I the Pope, I'd cause a Te Deum, to be sung(Brukner's)...
I put it's death right up there with Dhalmer's, or Gacy's...A cause for celebration...

...
Sorry if this turns some of you off...I hated the thing when it was "alive"; and I'm glad it's dead...
That rant over...
I'm listening to an very interesting CD it's called "American Weekend"...It's an old London, CD(1990)...It includes an interesting peice by Arron Copland, called Lincoln Portrait...Gregory Peck, reads the words of the late President..."And this is what he said-this is what Abraham Lincoln,said"..."As I would not be enslaved, so I would not be a Master"..."He said"...Makes me think of the "Hall of Presidents", at Disney World...What a tribute to that Office...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 02:35 AM

QUOTE (ArtInstigator @ June 18, 2008 - 06:03 PM)

Song of Solomon has many good verses. "Jumping the broom" is how slaves in this country used to marry because they did not have any human rights. It was a way to solemnize their unions when they weren't allowed to marry or have any control over their families. It was recognized by the slaves themselves as a rite of marriage.

It's usually one of the last elements of a wedding ceremony, often right after a prayer or benediction. The couple will jump the broom that has been placed in the aisle (usually the best man does this), then be presented as Mr&Mrs, then the recessional starts.

Also, I wanted to suggest Stevie Wonder's "I'll Be Loving You Always" for the reception. It's such a celebratory anthem; it gets peeps dancin'. If you plan to have a break in the 2 hours of music (for the cake), play this, and then take a break. Youngins might see some old farts shaking it!

ASK the bride if she has a song in mind for the father/daughter dance! How well do you know the bride's father? Could you ask him for suggestions?

My 23 y/o daughter had her father/bride song picked out by the time she was about 16.

AI

I think "Jumping the Broom" was more than just a Slave, ritual...But I could be wrong...While practiced amognst Slaves, I have read accounts of "House Slaves" getting married in the "Masters" house-"Jumping the Broom"...I have also read stories of "Whites" "Jumping the Broom"...

bJason

July 8, 2008 - 08:00 AM

QUOTE (psh072857 @ July 7, 2008 - 10:41 PM)

I can just see you in the Carmen Miranda, outfit...

...

Wouldn't be the first time!

bJason

July 8, 2008 - 08:01 AM

QUOTE (Pita @ July 6, 2008 - 03:11 PM)

bJason, I lurrrrve the music selection. Very much.

Thanks! I think it will be fun.

bJason

July 8, 2008 - 08:09 AM

QUOTE (psh072857 @ July 8, 2008 - 03:12 AM)

Hi ya gang...

Jazz, may I please book y'all's porch for the Death of Jesse Helms, party?...I think a full bbq is in order...

...The man was a bigot, racist, homophobe, misogonist(hated women),and an all around a$...When I heard he croaked I said "YES-Thank-you God"...
Were I the Pope, I'd cause a Te Deum, to be sung(Brukner's)...
I put it's death right up there with Dhalmer's, or Gacy's...A cause for celebration...

...
Sorry if this turns some of you off...I hated the thing when it was "alive"; and I'm glad it's dead...
That rant over...

Put me down to join in that party!

I lived in SC during a portion of its evil reign. We were near Ashville, NC and our TV stations covered the Asheville area so I saw him front and center (or extreme right, as it were) far more often than I would ever have cared to. Also had to deal with/vote against Strom Thurmond on several occassions. And if those weren't enough, I had to bartend from mini bottles!

**bows head in silent, gleeful prayer of thanks that all three are gone**

Snagglepuss

July 8, 2008 - 09:23 PM

QUOTE (psh072857 @ July 8, 2008 - 02:12 AM)

Hi ya gang...

Jazz, may I please book y'all's porch for the Death of Jesse Helms, party?...I think a full bbq is in order...

...The man was a bigot, racist, homophobe, misogonist(hated women),and an all around a$$...When I heard he croaked I said "YES-Thank-you God"...
Were I the Pope, I'd cause a Te Deum, to be sung(Brukner's)...
I put it's death right up there with Dhalmer's, or Gacy's...A cause for celebration...

...
Sorry if this turns some of you off...I hated the thing when it was "alive"; and I'm glad it's dead...
That rant over...
I'm listening to an very interesting CD it's called "American Weekend"...It's an old London, CD(1990)...It includes an interesting peice by Arron Copland, called Lincoln Portrait...Gregory Peck, reads the words of the late President..."And this is what he said-this is what Abraham Lincoln,said"..."As I would not be enslaved, so I would not be a Master"..."He said"...Makes me think of the "Hall of Presidents", at Disney World...What a tribute to that Office...

here is a joke for ya...

A right-wing, homophobic, hypocritical, religious zealot dies...

and goes to Hell...

He is greeted by a demon and he starts to beg and plead that he shouldn't be there and please don't torture him etc....

The demon says "Oh, we've updated our rules here in Hell. Now, you get to choose your own form of torture".

He shows him a room with a bound old man being whipped bloody by two beautiful young girls... (the man looks like he has been there hundreds of years...)

Then he shows him a room with a chained old man being burned with hot branding irons... (again, the man looks like he has been tortured for centuries...)

Then he shows him a room with an old man sitting in a comfortable chair, being serviced by a beautiful young blonde girl.... (and once again the man is ancient and decrepit, with sores and rotting flesh...)

The Bigot says "I'll take this room!"

The demon looks at him quizzically and says "Are you sure?... Once you've chosen, that is your eternal damnation. You must perform that task forever."

He screams "Yes!" He is absolutely positive that is his room....

So the demon taps the girl on the shoulder and says...

"You've been relieved".

mommakelly

July 8, 2008 - 09:25 PM

QUOTE (Snagglepuss @ July 8, 2008 - 09:23 PM)

here is a joke for ya...

A right-wing, homophobic, hypocritical, religious zealot dies...

and goes to Hell...

He is greeted by a demon and he starts to beg and plead that he shouldn't be there and please don't torture him etc....

The demon says "Oh, we've updated our rules here in Hell. Now, you get to choose your own form of torture".

He shows him a room with a bound old man being whipped bloody by two beautiful young girls... (the man looks like he has been there hundreds of years...)

Then he shows him a room with a chained old man being burned with hot branding irons... (again, the man looks like he has been tortured for centuries...)

The he shows him a room with an old man sitting in a comfortable chair, being serviced by a beautiful young blonde girl.... (and once again the man is ancient and decrepit, with sores and rotting flesh...)

The Bigot says "I'll take this room!"

The demon looks at him quizzically and says "Are you sure?... Once you've chosen, that is your eternal damnation. You must perform that task forever."

He screams "Yes!" He is absolutely positive that is his room....

So the demon taps the girl on the shoulder and says...

"You've been relieved".

Okay I for 1 love that joke!!

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 11:37 PM

QUOTE (bJason @ July 8, 2008 - 09:09 AM)

Put me down to join in that party!

I lived in SC during a portion of its evil reign. We were near Ashville, NC and our TV stations covered the Asheville area so I saw him front and center (or extreme right, as it were) far more often than I would ever have cared to. Also had to deal with/vote against Strom Thurmond on several occassions. And if those weren't enough, I had to bartend from mini bottles!

**bows head in silent, gleeful prayer of thanks that all three are gone**

Of course, you'll be DJing...

...

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 11:38 PM

QUOTE (Snagglepuss @ July 8, 2008 - 10:23 PM)

here is a joke for ya...

A right-wing, homophobic, hypocritical, religious zealot dies...

and goes to Hell...

He is greeted by a demon and he starts to beg and plead that he shouldn't be there and please don't torture him etc....

The demon says "Oh, we've updated our rules here in Hell. Now, you get to choose your own form of torture".

He shows him a room with a bound old man being whipped bloody by two beautiful young girls... (the man looks like he has been there hundreds of years...)

Then he shows him a room with a chained old man being burned with hot branding irons... (again, the man looks like he has been tortured for centuries...)

Then he shows him a room with an old man sitting in a comfortable chair, being serviced by a beautiful young blonde girl.... (and once again the man is ancient and decrepit, with sores and rotting flesh...)

The Bigot says "I'll take this room!"

The demon looks at him quizzically and says "Are you sure?... Once you've chosen, that is your eternal damnation. You must perform that task forever."

He screams "Yes!" He is absolutely positive that is his room....

So the demon taps the girl on the shoulder and says...

"You've been relieved".

Jazzie53

July 8, 2008 - 11:47 PM

QUOTE (psh072857 @ July 8, 2008 - 02:12 AM)

Hi ya gang...

Jazz, may I please book y'all's porch for the Death of Jesse Helms, party?...I think a full bbq is in order...

...The man was a bigot, racist, homophobe, misogonist(hated women),and an all around a$$...When I heard he croaked I said "YES-Thank-you God"...
Were I the Pope, I'd cause a Te Deum, to be sung(Brukner's)...
I put it's death right up there with Dhalmer's, or Gacy's...A cause for celebration...

...
Sorry if this turns some of you off...I hated the thing when it was "alive"; and I'm glad it's dead...
That rant over...
I'm listening to an very interesting CD it's called "American Weekend"...It's an old London, CD(1990)...It includes an interesting peice by Arron Copland, called Lincoln Portrait...Gregory Peck, reads the words of the late President..."And this is what he said-this is what Abraham Lincoln,said"..."As I would not be enslaved, so I would not be a Master"..."He said"...Makes me think of the "Hall of Presidents", at Disney World...What a tribute to that Office...

I couldn't say no to you on this one. Please feel free to use the porch, as always, free of charge!
Jazzie

Jazzie53

July 8, 2008 - 11:48 PM

QUOTE (Snagglepuss @ July 8, 2008 - 09:23 PM)

here is a joke for ya...

A right-wing, homophobic, hypocritical, religious zealot dies...

and goes to Hell...

He is greeted by a demon and he starts to beg and plead that he shouldn't be there and please don't torture him etc....

The demon says "Oh, we've updated our rules here in Hell. Now, you get to choose your own form of torture".

He shows him a room with a bound old man being whipped bloody by two beautiful young girls... (the man looks like he has been there hundreds of years...)

Then he shows him a room with a chained old man being burned with hot branding irons... (again, the man looks like he has been tortured for centuries...)

Then he shows him a room with an old man sitting in a comfortable chair, being serviced by a beautiful young blonde girl.... (and once again the man is ancient and decrepit, with sores and rotting flesh...)

The Bigot says "I'll take this room!"

The demon looks at him quizzically and says "Are you sure?... Once you've chosen, that is your eternal damnation. You must perform that task forever."

He screams "Yes!" He is absolutely positive that is his room....

So the demon taps the girl on the shoulder and says...

"You've been relieved".

You know, I had to log in just to LOL over this one. I'll be passing this one along without a doubt!
Jazz

TCPhil

July 8, 2008 - 11:55 PM

QUOTE (bJason @ July 8, 2008 - 09:00 AM)

Wouldn't be the first time!

I know the wedding's over but I heard a great song t' day that should be added to the list: Love Changes Everything, Andrew Lloyd Weber...It's a big over the top hymn to Love...I've heard it before of course, just forgot about it...

TCPhil

July 9, 2008 - 12:56 AM

QUOTE (Jazzie53 @ July 9, 2008 - 12:48 AM)

You know, I had to log in just to LOL over this one. I'll be passing this one along without a doubt!
Jazz

Uh yup...

...

chucole

July 10, 2008 - 12:59 PM

Next weekend is my annual NWWE. Anyone have any suggestions for lunch? Mind you, we will be on a raft on a river in the middle of Missouri, so it will have to pack in a waterproof bag or the cooler. We're a little sick of chicken salad. Much thanks.

partsgirl

July 10, 2008 - 01:22 PM

QUOTE (chucole @ July 10, 2008 - 01:59 PM)

Next weekend is my annual NWWE. Anyone have any suggestions for lunch? Mind you, we will be on a raft on a river in the middle of Missouri, so it will have to pack in a waterproof bag or the cooler. We're a little sick of chicken salad. Much thanks.

How about chicken salad with grapes? sorry... couldn't resist.

What about stuff to make hearty wraps? The wrappers lay flat and don't take up much room. You could have lunch meats or pulled pork or chicken (just a suggestion) or beef and then ziploc your accoutrements like lettuce, tomatoes, onions and dressing. Toss in some bacon and you're good to go!

chucole

July 10, 2008 - 01:39 PM

QUOTE (partsgirl @ July 10, 2008 - 12:22 PM)

How about chicken salad with grapes? sorry... couldn't resist.

What about stuff to make hearty wraps? The wrappers lay flat and don't take up much room. You could have lunch meats or pulled pork or chicken (just a suggestion) or beef and then ziploc your accoutrements like lettuce, tomatoes, onions and dressing. Toss in some bacon and you're good to go!

Good idea Parts, Especially the bacon.

chucole

July 11, 2008 - 03:57 PM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 11, 2008 - 02:29 PM)

That damn PG with that winning chicken
salad

Where'd everybody go????

I just spent the last day with 6 punk rockers and a ton of other punkers.lol
I met Pennywise.......woohoooo
They produced their new c/d.
OHMFG..My head hurts and I
have heat stroke but I got a great tan
and my whole family is here and ahhhhh.
Well....the siblings anyway.
My nephews were in Orlando playing on the Warped Tour.
My head is reverberating...I don't know how those kids do it..It's really a grueling schedule...They'll be in Miami tomox and my family will go but not me..I have had enough head banging for one lifetime and the
heat....I mean it's really hot.
I'll post pix as soon as my bro sends them.
Tele ain't the only one with copyrighted
concert pix now....hmmmph

The family are at the hotels so I get to rest.
Sigh
JUST in case anyone wants to go...Yeah right.
My brother made me buy them these cooling hats and they were mortifed
Rock on everybody...I'm punk rocked OUT.

http://www.warpedtour.com
/warpedtour/concerts.asp?tour=65

How you holding up Chuc????Is your family there??

This is Psh's birthday month so we need
to start early.
Hmmm.... What to get a flittah?????

Good night and Allah bless.

I got Bare Naked Ladies stuck in me head
darlin'....'Cause of you

Holding up good KK. Unfortunately I am at work so not with family. Next weekend is the annuall NWWE. The week after that I am going to Missouri again with all my boys. Waterpark, Six Flags and whatever us strikes our fancy. We're winging it.

shyjanne

July 12, 2008 - 07:43 AM

Us conservatives have lost a good one with the death of Tony Snow. I really liked the guy and he will be missed. Sympathies to the family.

tear drop

TaterTot

July 12, 2008 - 10:47 AM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 11, 2008 - 03:50 PM)

Oh OK as if I'm NOT shameless
enough..but their new album which I LOVE the title of
*The Organization Of Sound And Silence*

will be available on iTunes on Aug 2nd!
Yeah I know nobody here wants to hear
that.lol BUT I am SO proud of these kids.
This is them on their new Myspace page and a few songs you can listen to.
I have to say when they get older and stop raging against the machine...they will be REALLY good.

BUT they are good now if you can stand to listen
to it.
My God son Cubby drummer from HELL
is the one in the hat and
AJ is two down..with the LONG side hair
They are SO angry.

http://www.reverbnation.com/allurametal

KK...those are great looking kids...hope they become famous.

johnw

July 12, 2008 - 04:13 PM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 12, 2008 - 02:40 PM)

I'm gonna kill that Tele ...I added
more water than usual to my rice as per his instructions on the board..and it came too wet..Grrrrr No burn on though...ALMOST!!

Sooo it's Psh's Birthday month and the count down begins now.... A present a day.
From me at least......First I give him
a personal chef for the night...ok 2 nights.
Ok.... a week...Ok.... he can move in..
BUT a stipulation........OK torture.

No handling the goods dear sir.
SORRY strict union rules.
(yeah the faux chef union )

BUT you can certainly use the lobster bib as you watch him heat up your jets...We don't want no messy wet accidents on the kitchen floor.
Let the birthday month festivities begin for the pixie with the mostest ..He flits he flees and flies... He 's also adorable and says..mmkay for real lol
I don't know ANYONE who says
mmmkay for real.

You used the 2 to 1 ratio? 2 parts water to 1 part rice? I'd advise you to get a microwave rice cooker except I don't know who sells them anymore. The wife bought 3 of them at TJ Max - 6 bucks apiece. Perfect rice everytime - nothing burnt. cooking time 10 to 12 minutes depending on how powerful your microwave oven is.

johnw

July 12, 2008 - 04:15 PM

QUOTE (shyjanne @ July 12, 2008 - 07:43 AM)

Us conservatives have lost a good one with the death of Tony Snow. I really liked the guy and he will be missed. Sympathies to the family.

tear drop

Tony Snow was a really good guy and I'd say that even if he were a democrat.

TaterTot

July 12, 2008 - 04:22 PM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 12, 2008 - 02:40 PM)

I'm gonna kill that Tele ...I added
more water than usual to my rice as per his instructions on the board..and it came too wet..Grrrrr No burn on though...ALMOST!!

Sooo it's Psh's Birthday month and the count down begins now.... A present a day.
From me at least......First I give him
a personal chef for the night...ok 2 nights.
Ok.... a week...Ok.... he can move in..
BUT a stipulation........OK torture.

No handling the goods dear sir.
SORRY strict union rules.
(yeah the faux chef union )

BUT you can certainly use the lobster bib as you watch him heat up your jets...We don't want no messy wet accidents on the kitchen floor.
Let the birthday month festivities begin for the pixie with the mostest ..He flits he flees and flies... He 's also adorable and says..mmkay for real lol
I don't know ANYONE who says
mmmkay for real.

KK..I always just put 1 cup rice and 2 cups water, a little salt and a tbsp. butter, bring to boil ,cover,turn down to simmer for 15 minutes...always perfect rice. That is for long grain plain rice. If it ain't broke don't fix it.

Fordmanrod

July 12, 2008 - 08:00 PM

QUOTE (shyjanne @ July 12, 2008 - 08:43 AM)

Us conservatives have lost a good one with the death of Tony Snow. I really liked the guy and he will be missed. Sympathies to the family.

tear drop

You got that right... Tony was a pundits pundit.... fair to the extreme and always easy to listen to. I will miss his perception to the extreme.

Fordmanrod

July 12, 2008 - 08:04 PM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 12, 2008 - 06:09 PM)

That's what I always do and we better shhhh..
No more RICEGATE.

BUT we can tawk polish sawsage if you
like???

I need a Teflon pan methinks and
I used yellow rice so I need to try the basmati actually but keep forgetting to get it.
My son just went vegan again...NOW my
cooking as little as I do even gets more complicated...Thanks John for the tips too.
Rice...the other world problem....Who knew??

KK...we use jasmine rice for our everyday rice...makes great pilaf and everything.....AND the 2 to 1 ratio works every time. I do remember Alton Brown saying that if you are cooking larger amounts of rice that the ratio does change but I can't remember how.... 2 to1 seems to be best for me.

johnw

July 13, 2008 - 02:47 AM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 12, 2008 - 05:09 PM)

That's what I always do and we better shhhh..
No more RICEGATE.

BUT we can tawk polish sawsage if you
like???

I need a Teflon pan methinks and
I used yellow rice so I need to try the basmati actually but keep forgetting to get it.
My son just went vegan again...NOW my
cooking as little as I do even gets more complicated...Thanks John for the tips too.
Rice...the other world problem....Who knew??

KK,
I've been cooking my own rice since high school so I know a little bit about making rice. When I got married my wife got an automatic rice cooker - great invemtion - I wonder who did invent it. But now that the kids are on their own there is just the wife and myself and there is no need for an automatic rice cooker which is designed for cooking rice for more than two persons. The Microwave rice cooker is just right sizewise and cleanup couldn't be easier.

johnw

July 13, 2008 - 11:31 AM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 13, 2008 - 09:32 AM)

John ....If you know how I am laughing as someone from this board told me the other night.
IF I have to read one more post about
rice............

I could talk about that and Polish sawsage till
the cows go to the drunk neighbors.
I have a drunk mean old lady neighbor.
I hope the cows stomp on her good china.

I will check around for that BUT since
I will be moving in with my brother who is truly a kick arse cook ....I think I'll just let HIM make the rice from now on.
YES I'll have my own stove and
all...but I think I may have forgotten how to turn it on.

OK...... Norah Jones song damnit
How I love this song.

*I'm just sitting her waiting for you to come on
home and turn me on.My hi -fi is waiting for a new tune*.....swoooon

Yeah you do!

I'm going to get my car all analyzed up even though it's in great shape but just wanna' make sure it's all ok. Only 50,000 miles on a 98.

Yeah.... Mum's car.

Sorry about the rice - cooking rice shouldn't even be a topic of discussion. It's not much more complicated than boiling water which is why I scratch my head when I read that someone gets bad results.

Polish sausage was your major triumph and accomplishment. I am referring of course to the pics of the sausages in the pans. However with TC5 on the horizon polish sausage may find a place in the Top Chef museum of hot topics along with overgate and burntricegate.

Snora Jones.

You got a new battery for your car? 50,000 miles = half life. I own a 2005 Mazda 3S - 24,000 miles on it. Being retired has many benefits such as saving money on gas (not driving 30 miles a day to and from work).

Sports - NY Yankees not a contender this year so I am eagerly awaiting the Olympics. My cousin has a front row seat as he is working in Beijing.

johnw

July 13, 2008 - 03:57 PM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 13, 2008 - 02:02 PM)

Cool on the Olympics.. not so on my beloved Yankees!!.....sob

Yes..battery..... 90 $...grrrr
I won't be leaving my lights on again anytime soon.I blame that on the messy stars.
Snora Jones?????How dare you???

I LOVE that album and the very beautiful girl.
BUT you want some NON boring music???
Here's *The Rippingtons*
Gypsy Eyes..This one is a bit sedate for them but they do soooo rip.

Rip it UP baby

Polish sawsage...Well I had help from the
little obsessed PS peeps.

Actually *skilletdeux* was the genius behind the PS *revelations* as they are now known.
(I hear they may start a new verse and chapter or whatever that is in the Bible soon)
PS :119

I just let PS become part of my life and will fight for the right to PS anywhere anytime any place.
Let no PS go asunder or under.....cooked????

Oh RICE will always be a topic for moi.
I SUCK at it...Sometimes.Sometimes it's just right.Much like life..Rice ain't always easy.lol

Olympics: Just read that BMX will be part of the Beijing olympics. That is great news for the thousands of kids and adults who ride. My son and daughter rode BMX as children. My daughter got out after one year but my son was in it for 5 years and was nationally ranked. I still have his bikes that I custom built from scratch.

Battery - how did you manage to leave your lights on? Cars today beep if the lights are still on after you turn the ignition off. 1998 models didn't have that feature?

Polish Sausage - since WAJ has signed off for the summer who are you fighting?

Music - still stuck in the 60's and 70's.

Superannualted

July 13, 2008 - 05:24 PM

QUOTE (johnw @ July 13, 2008 - 03:57 PM)

Battery - how did you manage to leave your lights on? Cars today beep if the lights are still on after you turn the ignition off. 1998 models didn't have that feature?

I still drive my '99 Ford Taurus that has a beeper signal if the lights are left on. It worked fine for the first 75,000 miles at which time the beeper ceased to function. Restoring it cost about $50 as I remember. I had other work done at the same time so that's just an estimate of the actual cost.

.

Radyms13

July 13, 2008 - 06:22 PM

QUOTE (Superannualted @ July 13, 2008 - 06:24 PM)

I still drive my '99 Ford Taurus that has a beeper signal if the lights are left on. It worked fine for the first 75,000 miles at which time the beeper ceased to function. Restoring it cost about $50 as I remember. I had other work done at the same time so that's just an estimate of the actual cost.

.

I have a '99 Ford Contour...80,000 miles. I've had to do brakes once, battery, tires, oil....kinda the usual. The freakin worst was the rabbit that got into the engine/undercarriage and ate up $1300 worth of wire harnesses and vacuum tubes. It gets 29 MPG, it's paid for and cheap to insure. I married into a Ford family and this is the only one that wasn't Fix Or Repair Daily.

johnw

July 13, 2008 - 06:40 PM

QUOTE (Radyms13 @ July 13, 2008 - 06:22 PM)

I have a '99 Ford Contour...80,000 miles. I've had to do brakes once, battery, tires, oil....kinda the usual. The freakin worst was the rabbit that got into the engine/undercarriage and ate up $1300 worth of wire harnesses and vacuum tubes. It gets 29 MPG, it's paid for and cheap to insure. I married into a Ford family and this is the only one that wasn't Fix Or Repair Daily.

The wife recently took her 2000 Mazda Protege in for service. It seems there was a squirrel nest in the engine compartment. No damage unlike when she was stranded just outside NY City and had to take the train home. It seems that mice or some other animal had eaten insulation on some of the wiring in her 1980 Honda Civic stationwagon.

Radyms13

July 13, 2008 - 06:47 PM

QUOTE (johnw @ July 13, 2008 - 07:40 PM)

The wife recently took her 2000 Mazda Protege in for service. It seems there was a squirrel nest in the engine compartment. No damage unlike when she was stranded just outside NY City and had to take the train home. It seems that mice or some other animal had eaten insulation on some of the wiring in her 1980 Honda Civic stationwagon.

Amazing!! I've heard of cats crawling into the engine to keep warm but never heard of critters nesting in an engine or eating plastic car parts. I made the repair shop keep the parts because it happened within 12 hours.

brillke

July 13, 2008 - 08:06 PM

I know several people have discussed the BBCA show Little Britain and how great it is. Well,I just saw a commercial on HBO for Little Britain USA. How cool is that!

Not sure when it starts but the cast of characters looks the same so should be good.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showb...ticle245868.ece

Sampeg

July 13, 2008 - 08:18 PM

Hey Guys,
I'm going to take my request from the other thread here. Please check out the movie "Lust, Caution" by Ang Lee. Let me know what you think of it and your take.

Pegs

notevayas

July 13, 2008 - 09:01 PM

QUOTE (sampeg @ July 13, 2008 - 08:18 PM)

Hey Guys,
I'm going to take my request from the other thread here. Please check out the movie "Lust, Caution" by Ang Lee. Let me know what you think of it and your take.

Pegs

I may read the story by the late author Eileen Chang, but I don't as a rule watch NC17 movies.

I think what Ang Lee is exploring is indeed very dangerous.. the loss of "self". I would be most fascinated by "actors" opinion as I have always wondered if the rate of addiction/suicides in the dramatic arts is because of this occupational danger to the "self"? And espionage the same, and maybe even some kinds of obsessive love the same?

Here is a review I found..

By Min Lee, Associated Press HONG KONG — Oscar-winning Taiwanese director Ang Lee said Sunday he has low expectations for his new spy thriller Lust, Caution in the United States, because it is a "very Chinese" film that may be alien to American audiences. "Its pace, its film language — it's all very Chinese. I also used Western film noir. It's a new start for me. It's not very audience-friendly for a market like the U.S. It's not their subject matter," Lee told a forum for young directors in Hong Kong.

He acknowledged that Lust, Caution could marginalize him in the U.S. market after he gained mainstream recognition with films like the martial arts hit Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and the gay romance Brokeback Mountain, which won him a Oscar for best director last year.

Another obstacle is the film's rating in the United States of NC-17, which bans viewers younger than 17.

Lust, Caution, which won the top Golden Lion prize at the recent Venice Film Festival, is based on a short story by famed Chinese writer Eileen Chang. It's about a group of patriotic students who plot to assassinate the intelligence chief in the Japanese-backed Chinese government during the World War II era.

Sampeg

July 13, 2008 - 09:30 PM

QUOTE (notevayas @ July 13, 2008 - 10:01 PM)

I may read the story by the late author Eileen Chang, but I don't as a rule watch NC17 movies.

I think what Ang Lee is exploring is indeed very dangerous.. the loss of "self". I would be most fascinated by "actors" opinion as I have always wondered if the rate of addiction/suicides in the dramatic arts is because of this occupational danger to the "self"? And espionage the same, and maybe even some kinds of obsessive love the same?

Here is a review I found..

By Min Lee, Associated Press HONG KONG — Oscar-winning Taiwanese director Ang Lee said Sunday he has low expectations for his new spy thriller Lust, Caution in the United States, because it is a "very Chinese" film that may be alien to American audiences. "Its pace, its film language — it's all very Chinese. I also used Western film noir. It's a new start for me. It's not very audience-friendly for a market like the U.S. It's not their subject matter," Lee told a forum for young directors in Hong Kong.

He acknowledged that Lust, Caution could marginalize him in the U.S. market after he gained mainstream recognition with films like the martial arts hit Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and the gay romance Brokeback Mountain, which won him a Oscar for best director last year.

Another obstacle is the film's rating in the United States of NC-17, which bans viewers younger than 17.

Lust, Caution, which won the top Golden Lion prize at the recent Venice Film Festival, is based on a short story by famed Chinese writer Eileen Chang. It's about a group of patriotic students who plot to assassinate the intelligence chief in the Japanese-backed Chinese government during the World War II era.

Note, don't let the NC17 rating deter you from watching this movie. I myself usually do not watch NC rated movies, but bec I was familiar with the story and I'm a big fan of Ang Lee's and Tony Leung's, I watched it. I was glad I did. The movie is beautifully done and the nature of the film is more than a spy movie. The NC 17 rating was given due to the graphic sex scenes that were included. However, the scenes are not as gratuitous as we usually see in US films. Ang Lee described it as the equivalent of the fighting scenes in Crouching Tiger. The scenes contribute to the story and show the evolution of the two main characters. Also, I believe that there are R-rated versions of the film and also feel free to fast forward to the scenes that maybe offensive to you.

Sampeg

July 13, 2008 - 09:37 PM

QUOTE (Kristlkrost @ July 13, 2008 - 10:33 PM)

Why would NC-17 bother adults???
I see that and I want to go!!!
BUT I like all movies pretty much... Even
bad ones

KK, check this one out. Like what was said in the previous post, this story is losing or finding one's self. However, in this instance, the main character (played wonderfully by a newbie- Tang Wei) actually found herself IMO. But then, I maybe wrong, that's why I want you guys to see it.

johnw

July 13, 2008 - 09:46 PM

QUOTE (Radyms13 @ July 13, 2008 - 06:47 PM)

Amazing!! I've heard of cats crawling into the engine to keep warm but never heard of critters nesting in an engine or eating plastic car parts. I made the repair shop keep the parts because it happened within 12 hours.

Mice do eat insulation off of wires. It's all on the internet.